This one is more fun than a Victoria's Secret catalog. It does start out pretty unpleasant, but once you get past the first parts it's a stone gas. Some authentic laughs, of the sadistic variety to be sure.

MISSION: The last one ended with you entering the tunnel to the U-boat base. This is the sequel: you come out of the tunnel and you have to get into the sub pen and blow up the U-boat in its dock.

CONDITIONS: Almost entirely indoors in brightly-lit spaces.

THE OPPOSITION: 25 or so naval personnel, variously armed. Mostly grouped near the target U-boat, but others scattered about the place. Half a dozen pursuing from the previous locality.

PERSONNEL: Same ones you had for C4M4, of course.

EQUIPMENT: One explosive charge minimum; I like to plant two just for the hell of it but it's not necessary. Everybody gets an MP-44 and lots of ammo. Also carry a few Mills grenades. Half a dozen or so.

AT THE START: You're at the far end of the tunnel you entered at the end of C4M4. You won't be alone for long.

PROCEDURE: Immediately drop to a crouch and look up toward that raised area with the railing, over to the far left side. A guard is about to appear there and if you don't shoot him immediately he will open fire and probably hit some of you.

Once he's down, stand up again and move back and to the side until you can see the upper half of a truck up on the next floor. Spray it till it explodes. There is a man standing nearby and this will kill him. You might want to go up the stairs just a little way and use third-person to confirm he's down; he'll be over by those wall lockers. Don't go any farther than necessary, though, certainly not past the second landing.

Now start moving your men out of the tunnel. Move them over to the right (their right, as they come out of the tunnel) and have them lie down or kneel facing the tunnel entrance. Give them all Guard on the mouth of the tunnel.

Once they're in position, go back up the stairs to the second landing again. Then run back down the stairs; all you're trying to do is trip a trigger. Crouch down on the first landing, over by the wall, or get down on the floor underneath the stairs if you like, or go over beside the others, whatever you prefer. Watch that tunnel mouth.

Because you didn't just walk away clean from that business at the command center. There are some hellhounds on your trail and now is your chance to get them.

You may have to wait a bit. You may conclude that you didn't trip the trigger and need to do it again. You may be right, but wait at least a little longer, because it does take some time before they appear.

There are half a dozen of them but fortunately they come out of the tunnel one at a time so it's no great trick to gun them down - hell, there are four of you after all. And they make a clomping sound before you see them. Wait and make sure you get all six of them. Have your men search them; one is carrying an excellent machine gun, which one of your men should take.

(Sometimes, though, they'll fall together in a heap and it may not be possible to find the gun. That's OK, don't worry too much about it.)

Now to get out of this hole. Go up the stairs again and back up the last flight. Use third person to study the big open doorway nearby, beyond those metal barrels. Watch till you see a couple of guards come by. Study their movements; they walk a very strange pattern. When they've moved on out of sight, haul ass up that ladder and run around the end of that railing and get over by the eastern wall.

Move to your left until you're next to the big door at that end, staying up against the wall and taking care not to show yourself in the doorway. Use the lookaround technique again to study the big room next door. Watch those two sentries walking their curious beat, around and around the room, one behind the other. Take your time, till you get the feel of their timing and their route.

When the first one has moved on out of sight and the other is heading away from you, move to your left just far enough to shoot him in the back. I repeat, just far enough to shoot him. Do not move far enough to your left to expose yourself to the man standing down by those tall cabinets at the far end of the big room. You won't be able to see him very well - maybe not at all - but trust me, he's there. It's possible to move out into the doorway enough to hit a sentry without giving him a shot at you, but one step too far and he'll get you.

And even if you don't he may come after you. It doesn't happen too often, but it's a possibility. So after shooting the first sentry, step quickly back to the right and turn and cover the doorway and wait a moment, just in case he comes through. If he does you can eliminate him with no trouble and have one problem less to deal with.

One other note of caution: step well back from the wall before doing your sidestep. You can get nicked by ricochets off that concrete wall if you're too close. Seriously; you can run up a pretty nasty health bite that way.

Now wait and watch the other sentry and get him in the same way. Down by that door at the far end is a good spot to nail him. If that bastard down by the lockers is still there, then continue to be careful.

Now you've got an enemy down by the double doors on the south side. He's too far to grenade but if you go down to the other big door and do a quick sidestep you should be able to blast him before he can turn and shoot; he's not very fast.

Finally there's the one over toward the northeast corner of the big room, by those cabinets - assuming he didn't charge you and he's still there. He's only got a pistol but you know how that goes in H&D. But reload and sidestep some more and you can get him - just start spraying as soon as you see those wooden cabinets, he's right there.

When you've cleaned out that room it's time to have a little fun. See that halftrack over by the wall? Hop in and start it up and drive through the nearest big door and then hang a sharp right and drive into that great big bay where they've got one of the submarine docks. There's no sub in this one but there are a couple of guards and as usual they will shoot at you like idiots until they've burned up all their ammo. Now and then it happens that one of them fails to rise to the bait, in which case just drive on down the dockside and run him down.

This is as good a time as any to bring the rest of the men up. You probably won't enjoy this part; you know by now what the AIs can be like in enclosed spaces and getting them up that ladder is no picnic. But bring them on up anyway and have them wait in that big room beside the railing.

When you've taken care of the two guards by the sub pen, get out of your track and head back into that second big room. (You may encounter one or both guards standing around empty-handed, or clutching grenades but doing nothing with them. Go ahead and shoot them because if you don't they'll be a distraction for your men.)

Now you need to clean out that little supply room over at the northeast corner. There are three guys in there, two in the front room and one in an adjoining chamber. You can grenade the room but it's not easy to get grenades in there far enough to do the job without getting shot at.

So go back into the other room, where you got the track, and over to the south side, where there's a door that opens into a supply room. Look around and you'll find a case of Panzerfausts. Pick up a couple of these and go back and, standing a respectful distance back, fire them through the doorway into that northeast supply room. The explosions will take care of whoever's in the front room, much better than grenades.

There's one man way off down at the end of an adjoining room - to your right as you go in the door - and he'll probably still be alive and dangerous. But you don't have to give him a shot at you. Just go far enough through the door that you can see some of the boxes and barrels stacked in that room, and fire a burst. The whole room will go up and take him with it.

When you've got the supply room cleared, you need to do a little preliminary preparation work for the next phase. Go down to the south end of the room and open those big double doors. You may have a little trouble doing so; the trick is to get in the middle of each door, rather than where they come together. When they're both open you'll see the Kubelwagen parked just outside. That's the team getaway vehicle.

Look back inside and to your left and you'll find a BMW motorcycle with side hack. Go get on board and start it and ride it out the door and park it near the Kubelwagen. You're going to want it later and besides, it's in the way of what you're going to do next.

At this point send somebody back into that room where you got the Panzerfausts. Over by the wall near the door are a couple of machine guns. Take one, and then hit Use on the other one to get its ammo. You'll need this later.

Now you're about to have some real fun.

Climb into that other halftrack, the one right by where the bike was parked. Start it up and drive it - better make sure your men are well out of the way, like maybe in the next room - over to those big closed double doors on the north wall. Don't drive right up to them, just get the track's nose up to the start of the alcove. Maneuver as necessary to get the track lined up on the center of the doorway.

Stay in the track. Get two of your men - the two best shots - and have them lie down on the floor well to the rear of the track, one on either side. If one of them has that machine gun you scored from the stiffs downstairs, let him use that. Aim them so one covers the doorway on the right of the track and the other on the left. Give them Guard.

Now take control of your fourth man and move him into the doorway alcove. Shift him over to the left side and walk him up against the middle of the doorway, just where you had to get to push those other doors open. (I had you do that first so you'd know how for this part.)

Right, now for some coordinated motion. Your guy at the door is going to have to push it open and move very rapidly to his right at the same time. So get your fingers over the Use, Move Right and Run keys, and hit them all at once.

The door will creak open. Bullets will pop through but your man should already be out of the way and running like hell for that supply room doorway, because the shit is about to hit the fan.

As soon as the door man is safe, go back to your own viewpoint and third person, so you can appreciate what's going on. Almost immediately some Kraut with more balls than brains is going to run up and open the other half of that double door, and of course get his ass shot off by your guys. Probably two or three more will run up to the doorway and try to rush through, and meet with the same terminal fate. I mean, it's damn near pathetic, they never even get off a shot - they're hung up on that track, they don't even see the ambush till it's too late.

After the wall-climbers quit trying to rush the doorway, gun the track a little and drive it through the doorway, just a little way - stop with the front end sticking into the sub bay, don't go any farther. By now they'll be firing at you like crazy. With their attention now fully engaged, back up through the doorway - not so far they can't see you, leave the front end visible, and for God's sake don't back over your own men!

At this point several of the silly bastards will come chasing after the track, and get burned down as soon as they appear in the doorway. It's a real turkey shoot and the Third Reich is providing the turkeys. What makes it even more ridiculous is that by the time they reach the doorway most of them are out of ammo.

Things will finally quiet down until there are only a couple of men firing, one over in the far corner by the U-boat's bow and one up on the sub's conning tower. They've got MP-44s and, being morons like all the AIs, they fire them semi-auto, one shot at a time, instead of full-auto.

You can wait till they run out of ammo, but if you get tired of hearing that monotonous bam bam bam you can cut it short. Have your man who's holed up in the supply room go over to the northeast corner and open that door. There'll be another door beyond that; open that too and cut down on those fools out by the U-boat. By now they're totally obsessed by the halftrack, they won't even notice the new attacker till it's too late. Put a burst into that bunch of shiny barrels down at the far end and when they explode that'll take out the guard there. Then you can swing around and shoot that jackass off the conning tower.

Once everything is quiet it's time for the next tricky bit.

In a room opening off to the right of the sub bay, down by the gangway that goes out to the U-boat, there's a bunch of sailors getting ready for the cruise. Of course they're all heavily armed - I mean, we all know that sailors routinely pack automatic weapons to briefings....

They didn't get involved in the recent shootout; they must have assumed the guards could handle it. But when anybody goes past that doorway, they're all going to boil out of there and they're going to be shooting.

You're way ahead of me, aren't you?

Have your man with the captured machine gun go through the supply room and lie down in the doorway with his weapon aimed down the dockside. Give him Guard on the area in front of that doorway.

Drive the track through the door again and turn right and come to a stop on the dockside, near the U-boat's stern. Get your other men and position them on either side of the big door you just drove through. If one of them got that machine gun out of the supply room, put him where he's got a good clear field of fire on that doorway. The other can lie beside him with his MP-44. Give them Guard on that doorway.

If nobody blew those fuel barrels along the far end of the dockside yet, get out and use your MP-44 to do it now. Let the flames subside before continuing.

Now start the track and drive it over to the other side of the sub bay and turn left and drive down along the dockside, right past that door. Come to a stop wherever is convenient for you. By this time bullets will be zinging off the track's armor again, with the usual zero effect. (That's why we blew the fuel barrels: didn't want a stray shot exploding them while you're down that way.)

This will not go on long at all. In fact it will be over almost before it starts, because your boys are going to drop them. When you finally get out of the track and walk back to see, you'll probably find all of them in a big heap.

Time to get the lads out of there. Run them all out to the Kubelwagen and drive it back down the road to the point where you came in at the start of the previous mission. Down near the power pylon the Kubelwagen will hit the usual invisible wall and come to a stop.

Nothing left to do now but go out to the sub and finish the job. Don't go poking around in that area those guys came out of; there's nothing of any real interest and I'm pretty sure there's another goon or two lurking in the side rooms. They won't be doing it very long, so leave them alone.

It's kind of cool walking around on the U-boat's deck - you can even climb the ladder to the bridge if you like, just for the view - but then you need to get on with the project. Walk out onto the bow and step down into the open hatchway where the torpedoes lie. (The designers of this game had not a clue about how torpedoes are loaded onto a submarine, but never mind for now.) Place a charge, or charges if you like, in the middle of the torpedo compartment, next to the warheads.

Set the timer for maximum and haul some serious ass out the way you came and out through the big outside doors. Hop on the Beemer and putt away. If you want you can stop and turn around beside that garage and wait for the explosion. There won't be anything to see but the sound effects are pretty neat.

(Do not, however, go back to see the results of your work, or hang around even briefly after the explosion. Some guys are going to come running from that other building and they'll shoot your young ass off if it's still there.)

Then all you have to do is ride down to where the others are waiting and get in the Kubelwagen and it's off once more to dear old Blighty.

I really like that mission.

And God, I hate the next one.